You'll not get me admitting my age - unless you insist, but lately (as a result of moving house - once again), I found myself going through some old photograph albums and loose photos.
As as aside I often wonder what the present generation is going to do in seeking photos of their forebears and relations (other than going via the internet) without the advantage of old photos. There are people who are transferring all this information to their iPhoto files I admit, but can you fit them all in, and surely there must be hundreds that are missed, in the process.
However, I digress.
I discovered a funny thing. Although I was told, repeatedly, during my growing up years that I was "fat" and more to the point unacceptable, within the family to some extent as well as to society as a whole, I look at some of my photos and I can't believe I ever took upon myself the "guilt" associated with believing I was excessively over-weight! And it's a mighty burden to bear. Not the weight, but the guilt!
Because I'm astounded to see in those photos that yes, I'm a generously endowed girl/woman, but I'm not fat. And certainly not "obese" as I was described so many times.
Negative words, cruel words, scathing words, scalding words, inappropriate words such as "obese" and now "morbidly obese" do nothing for the person who does not fit the mould of "petite" or thin. Those negative words break down whatever self-esteem or confidence that person has, and can debilitate them into becoming disillusioned, confused, insecure people. And those feelings can last a life-time and can have irreparable consequences.
So only yesterday when I was visiting my Dr (he had previously been my Doctor before I moved up-country two years ago), he re-affirmed my feelings of self-worth by telling me, you're not obese, only perhaps a bit overweight.
So that brings me to the point of my topic today. Sometimes it's a matter of walking down memory lane and remembering things and people and circumstances and happy times and even sad times with a mind that also balances the idea that "hey, I'm a very special person as I am,regardless of my age, size and shape! Just as I am - right now!" We have to allow ourselves the freedom of seeing ourselves as special and valuable to ourselves.
Monday, April 12, 2010
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